A few weeks ago I experienced the death of my first patient. It came suddenly and unexpectedly during a routine prenatal care visit. My patient was a healthy young lady, 12 weeks pregnant, who came in complaining of some vaginal bleeding. I knew that vaginal bleeding early in pregnancy could either be nothing, or a sign of trouble. My patient calmly explained her symptoms to me and didn't seem alarmed at all, which made me worry less. Her examination also seemed normal for that stage of pregnancy. The intern and senior resident thought it was probably nothing too, but we had to do an ultrasound to make sure. The ultrasound showed a lifeless fetus measuring at 8 weeks, with significant intrathoracic calcifications. Since my Spanish was the best, I had to explain to our patient that her baby had died inside of her. I had to make her understand that this wasn't her fault and that she had three possible treatment options. She nodded her head through a constant stream of tears, but I knew her grief prevented her from fully comprehending my words. The experience made me realize just how quickly things changed in medicine.
One of the reasons I was initially really interested in OB/GYN was that overall the outcomes are very positive. You get to help bring new life into the world much more that you see your patients pass on to the afterlife. I've realized that you can never truly escape death's dark cloud in medicine. The best thing you can learn to do is find a way to prepare yourself for the unpredictable.
